How Do I convince My Parents to Stop Driving?

Are you worried about your parent(s) driving? If so, you are not alone. So often we hear from adult caregiver children that they don't know how to get their parents to stop driving although they know that it is no longer safe for them. Why is it that otherwise sensible seniors hold so tight to their car keys at the risk of harming themselves or others? Everyone craves independence; and they view the loss of those keys as a loss of independence and dignity. If the keys have to be yanked from their hands that is even more the case.

Many seniors are still quite capable of driving. Others are in total denial. Shortly after giving up driving one. gentleman was quoted as saying: "It wasn't so bad...all except for the double vision." If you are worried about your parent(s) safety it is important to have a conversation with them sooner as opposed to later. Don't wait until they have had an accident.

The best conversations involve your parents in the decision making process. Perhaps you can talk about the fact that they have lived a good life and have always shown good judgment. Encourage them to take a senior driving assessment so that they can make an educated decision about continuing to drive. In many instances there are skills they can learn to stay behind the wheel. If not, it is important to let them know that you won't leave them stranded. Alternative transportation is very important. Also, don't try to do a role reversal and become the parent. They are still your parents and should be treated with respect.

Put yourself in their shoes. All of us can remember when we passed our driving exam or got our first car. That sense of independence. One creative family held onto the car keys for their 90 year old Dad; but they left the car in his driveway. Every week they would sit in the car with him while he was in the drivers seat just so he could remember what it was like. They did a great deal of bonding and reminiscing during those "drives".

If, after all the conversation and encouragement, they still insist on driving you may be able to gain the support of your family physician. Sometimes parents will listen to them rather than their children. Often it is difficult for adult children to have these types of conversations. Home Instead Senior Care has coined the phrase, The 40/70 Rule, with tips on how to make it easier for 40 year olds to talk with their 70 something parents. Likewise they talk about the 70/40 Rule to assist parents in talking with their children. The "Generation Gap" can still have an impact beyond our teenage years and create roadblocks to comfortable conversation. By following some simple strategies we can ease the discomfort.

For more information go to www.homeinstead.com.